This week on STAY WOKE!

STAY WOKE! Have you ever watched a 90’s sitcom where they had to make a choice and on one shoulder was the angel and the other the devil? Yes? So put yourself in that same scene with the angel and the devil. VSG or any bariatric surgery is not easy. Bariatric surgery is a tool and we will for ever have that angel and devil sitting on our shoulders. REALITY CHECK! Hello what is right and what is wrong?

We are our own worst enemies. We are the sabotagers of our own lives. Have you ever taken a moment as to why we sabotage? I have. Rebellion and absolutely no self worth. Yup, none. I never realized I didn’t give myself worth until the father of my children died. His passing was self infliction and in that moment in my life I realized I was done lowering my standards in people.

I always thought I was not worthy of anything good in life. Well, that is what I grew up thinking because I was pretty much told that all my life. Once you hear it and its constant you believe its true. I was so naive and dumb growing up. Literally oblivious and confused as a teenager. Thinking back I have no clue how I survived. I was a tall, skinny, awkward girl with dark brown curly unruly hair and tan. Far cry from being beautiful in my eyes. But I grew up, yes I sure did and not in a healthy way either. Mentally that is.

Fast forward a few decades to today. Bariatric I am  (as Yoda would say) and this had to be the hardest thing I have ever done to commit to losing weight. That word “commit” phew that is a tough one. I have issues with commitment and being obligated to anything. But I committed to this surgery as it was my only saving grace to losing weight. Let’s talk about my formula “Negativity = Failure”.

Negativity = Failure

How you ask? Just think about it. If you are consistently in a bad place. Always angry, anxiety driven, depressed, bitter, envious and overwhelmed. All these things could cause you to be a negative nelly.

Negativity, why are you negative? Do you feel that you have a sense of entitlement to make everyone around you feel less so you can feel better about yourself? If so, you better put yourself in check because you never know when someone will give it back to you. And I am sure it will not be pretty.

Example: You had surgery everything is moving along, time passes and life events happen. BAM! You just put on weight, what on God’s green earth is going on? Karma? Negative head space? Entitlement? Loss of self-awareness? (Think about it for a moment)

Negativity, why are you negative? Your surroundings; do you have lack of support at home and have enablers that have not jumped on the road to success of a healthy lifestyle? Healthy lifestyle does not mean become a superstar athlete and become vegan all greens. What does success look like for you? Giving up carbonated and sugary drinks or processed food, eating out, etc.

Example: Are you doing groceries with your family? Do you have an on-the-go life? Are you in an environment where unhealthy food is always readily available? Enablers maybe? Think about your surroundings and figure out who is sabotaging who here. Be honest. Its okay if you start crying. Reality baby. It sucks but it’s very much real.

Negativity, why are you negative? Are you in a relationship that is struggling? Relationships are tough when becoming a bariatric patient. It’s no joke. Men or women have preferences in their partners and they may think they made a bad decision in choosing their significant other. Ask yourself; am I in a healthy supportive relationship? Is there communication and understanding? Sometimes there is not. It happens but it does not make it okay. Many of us make the mistake of staying because of children or there is no way out because there is no financial independence.

Example: You just got into a disagreement about dinner options. (I know corny but hear me out) This argument is stressful and food is comfort for most.. Oh that chocolate chip cookie is calling my name. Yum, Yum.. Yeah NO! Stop! Get the damn pizza did you know that most pizza places offer a cauliflower crusted pizza and you can customize? Ah, YEAH! Bam problem solved right? NO. Your emotions are ahead of you because you are in a negative head space… Ask your self. Am I being reasonable am I able to reason with my significant other without making it an argument?

So in reality, NEGATIVITY + FAILURE = WEIGHT-GAIN; sadly yes. Negativity takes up a lot of unnecessary energy. Frankly it’s exhausting. Negativity weighs on your shoulders and drags you down and no-one else. Reason being, people have the ability to walk away and not care and you will find yourself all alone at the end of the day. Your issues are not their issues; plain and simple. STAY WOKE PEOPLE because at the end of the day no one can change you but you.